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Who da hell told MTV they can air a first showing of a Charm School Episode?
Whomever it was deserves the Congressional Medal of Honor because we really could not wait another six days to see New York make her appearance and Larissa receive her comeuppance.
Nice words aside, it's recap time...

Darra and Schatar are gone but the issue of who stole the pictures, resides still, on the minds of Brooke and Leilene (why? Nobody misses them)
Suddenly they have doubts but before they theorize further (instead of asking for the blasted tape), Mo'Nique spares us the folly with an announcement to gather in the hall (or wherever they congregate)

Assembled at the hall, details are given, such as the Commandment for today's lesson, 'Thou shalt represent', the challenge and reward (a celebrity interview and immunity at the Elimination Ceremony).

The guest Dean for this Episode is Kevin Fraser from 'Entertainment Tonight' (nice guy) and his remit is teaching the girls how to conduct themselves and stay on message at a press junket.
Now if you've seen Kevin before you'd know he's a bit of a comedian so it was no surprise that he began his lesson with a replay of the ladies "previous body of work"
The first images are that of Rebecca Johnston at the Flavor of Love 2 Reunion Show doing that awful "step to this" routine and throwing a shoe.
We hear Leilene telling a tale of a guy who threw a bottle at her face and a clip of Saaphyri.

But more entertaining were re-showings of the spitting incident and Larissa charging the stage to get at New York
Mo'Nique observes the girls' reaction to the clips and notes it changed from giggles to embarrassment.

Kevin then advises the girls that going out there is about "staying on the message and selling your show" and then "suggests a little role play."
He chooses Leilene and asks her about the bottle incident and if she's had any other crazy boyfriends since that incident. Her reply was "can I say no comment" but Kevin suggests (and prefers) "you know what, I am here to talk about Charm School. I feel like we're going backwards if we talk about that incident"

Lesson learnt he moves to the second lesson of media interaction, 'Don't take the bait' ('Stay on message' was the first)
This, he explains is about coaxing something of negative interest out of the subject and he cites an example. The culprit was Larissa, who "during an interview, gave up the winner of the Flavor of Love".
Larissa replied, "I never said anything" but Kevin wielded the transcript of the interview at her.
Once again she denied spilling the beans and offered a defense that they could have written anything they wanted to write.

Kevin: so you think, you think they just made it up?
Larissa: I know what they said to me
Kevin: so do we, it was on the radio. It went out over the airwaves
(Lesson 2 1/2: When you are dealing with the Larissas of this world it's best to just let them talk)

Kevin ends by saying Larissa was taking the bait, whilst Larissa -at the confessional- says "Kevin can kiss my ass on that"

Lesson 3 is 'Damage Control',"if something happened in the past, America will forgive you when you come and you say 'I made a mistake'" (Kevin forgot to say that only works if you're white)
What? It's the truth.
The role-player for this lesson is Rebecca Johnston

Kevin: why would you throw a shoe at someone? You could have hit Lala. You could have hurt her
Becky: I might have had a few sips of champagne too many
Kevin: you were intoxicated?
Becky: I wouldn't say intoxicated, maybe slightly inebriated (potato, potahto)

Kevin states she ought to have said that was her bad behavior and she's sorry for it.
The fourth and final media-lesson is 'Do not lose your cool' and Brooke is the role-playing guinea-pig.

Kevin: did you spit on New York?
Brooke: Yes, I did.
Kevin: why did you tell a newspaper that you did not spit on her
Brooke: that's not what I meant, I just said I don't spit on people

More bi-play ensues but Kevin chastises her for letting him pursue a line that's nothing but negative.
Mo'Nique interjects to warn them that she hopes they retained the information because "today it's real"
Saaphyri summarizes the lessons in the confessional, "if you don't want to answer, deflect it. If you do have to answer, lie about it" (just stfu, Saaphyri)
With that it was press-junket time.

New York Returns
The ladies are isolated from the interview-room where Brooke is taken to meet the mysterious, celebrity interviewer. Looking on in another room are Keith, Mikki, Kevin and Mo'Nique.
We all know who it is but you can't help but exclaim when the HBIC arrives. With a twirl and spin, New York announces her appearance. (as Tyra said, she knows how to make an entrance)

***Let's take a break from the recap for a while to talk about New York. Her appearance energized the show. The first words out of Mikki's mouth was "Oh, here we go", and that's the truth because New York makes things happen.
Keith couldn't stop smiling and Mo'Nique and Kevin looked tense.
She is the HBIC, and she'll make it rain on ya***

New York: (high-pitched laughter) So have you (makes 'hoarking' sound) spit on anyone yet?
Brooke: absolutely not, I've learnt from that and I am a better person now
New York: ok, Brooke, whom here you just don't get along with
(in the viewing-room, Kevin mouths, "don't")
Brooke: I definitely had a few problems with Larissa (a violation of Lesson 2)

Next was Saaphyri who remarked New York got her boobs done and they are still sagging (stfu, yours look like extra legs)

New York: so, have you punched anyone dead in the face yet
Saaphyri: I am here in Charm School to change those type of ways not to enhance them
("Go on now, go on now" shouts Mikki Taylor in the viewing room) (sigh)
New York then addresses Saaphyri's weave and describes it as having candy-apple red tips but Saaphyri says, "it's not candy-apple red, it's pink" (which makes Saaphyri dumb, deaf and color-blind)

Saaphyri did give an excellent answer to the question shown but we aren't here to make her look good so I'll pretend it never happened. I will admit however, that Kevin said "she rocked that like a professional"

Larissa was next...
New York: the last time I saw you, you were tryna kill me at the Reunion Show
Larissa: and I apologize for that because I am a better person (said with that vacant stare of hers)
New York: I am so sorry to see that you turned into such a little punk bitch (lmwbhao)
In the confessional Larissa said "New York know, anywhere I see you; I will fuck you up (all mouth. The only things missing are the red towel and the Stallionaires cap)

Three down and three to go. Leilene, come on down!
New York: so in the Flavor of Love Reunion, it came out that you have a history of dating abusive men. How did it feel after you got your ass beaten? Was it wild animal sex afterwards? Like what happened after this beat-down? (that's just wrong)
Leilene: here, I am focusing more on my career, blah blah blah (you get the picture, she didn't take the bait)

Let's see what will happen with Shay
New York: so Bootz...oh I am sorry, I mean Buckeey. (lmao) You know you've been following her around so much
Shay: I wouldn't say I've been following her around but you know on Charm School I've been learning a lot, and I am learning to find out more about myself.
(Kevin cheers)
New York hugs her for some reason and Shay pretends to be repulsed

Finally, we have Buckwild and we are led to believe that this is some apocalyptic showdown because Buckwild said she'd kill New York when next she saw her (Mo'Nique will be a size 2 before I believe that mess)
Even Mo'Nique plays into the drama, "ok, can we have security here" (for what?)

New York: ok Becky, so why did you talk with that black accent?
Becky: I've been working on it since Charm School. I know that there are certain situations, that you know, that you can be ghetto And certain situations that you should be a proper lady in.
New York: so are you saying that black people are ghetto? (I want to know that answer too)
Becky: No, not at all...
New York: (interrupting) well give me your accent
Becky: it's time to get Buckwild dawg (no, no you just didn't perform on cue, smh)
New York: (screams) that's that fake-ass bitch that we've been looking for

Oh dear! New York then cons her into tattle-telling on all the ladies as Becky has the worst interview of the lot (she looked damn good though. Clearly she didn't give away all the good stuff in Episode 6)
The funniest bit was Buckwild saying Pumkin told Larissa she's trying to be New York; to which New York replied "more like New Jersey" (Ha!)
In the viewing room, Keith described the Buckwild interview as a "train-wreck" but Becky leaves the interview room well chuffed and pleased with her performance

Press Junket ends/ Results time
Everyone is together again (including New York) and Kevin presents the results, starting with Brooke, "you took the bait when she said who you don't like in the house and you kinda fell for that" (she's bi-sexual so she'll fall for anything)

"Shay! You turned it on and you shined. It was fantastic"

"Larissa, I was nervous, but you know what? When she got to the room you smiled; and that was beautiful. Good job."

"Becky. You started singling like a canary. You named names..."

"Leilene, she said some things to you; that were CRAZY, and you know what you did? You never got flustered and I think New York got flustered"

"Saaphyri, you were phenomenal. You never got rattled. You were exciting, and fun...Today; you were the best"
So Saaphyri wins and is exempt from elimination.

***Break time again. People have such low expectations of Saaphyri that any crap she does is magnified into some great effort. What the hell was so phenomenal about that?***

On the bus, Becky is crying like the midget on Martin, snot running from the nose and e'rything.

Back at the Mansion
At home Becky is worried because she knows this decision is clear-cut. She performed terribly and her ass is gone unless someone outs themselves. She decides a private meeting with Mo'Nique is an option but asks Shay's opinion before the visit.
Rightfully, Shay says "I wouldn't fucking do it if I were you" but Becky wonders if it may be a "tactic to get me out of this game" (Huh?)

With the challenge completed and nothing else to do, Leilene resuscitates the mystery of the missing picture and is determined to learn the identity of the thief. (clearly the producers of the show got involved to push this plot)
Soon enough, all are involved with Shay and Larissa, in particular accusing everyone except Leilene. (after New York's appearance this feels like cuddling after sex...totally unnecessary)

After much debate, discussion and discourse, everyone except Shay and Larissa is convinced that Shay is the thief. All of this occurs as Shay has a sudden and co-incidental attack of her conscience. (funny how that always happens when the truth is closing in on you)

Later in the day the Becky mulls over the incident at length, not because she gives a damn about who stole the pictures but more because she knows this is her way to stave off elimination (for a show that's supposed to teach Charm it seems to be teaching Cunning)
The tedium is broken up by a note that instructs the girls to prepare a surprise Birthday Party for Mo'Nique.

Mo'Nique's Birthday Party
As the ladies setup the decorations and whatnots, Becky let it slip that "the word on the street" is Shay did it. Naturally, a blow-up occurs and the accusations and counter-accusations ensue until all hell breaks loose when Shay learns that Larissa is part of the Inquisition.
(It's unclear what Larissa was plotting by being involved with his because sinking Shay sinks her, but my belief is she was just going along to keep her name out of the suspicious minds.)

All the chips are falling for Becky it seems...as Shay and Larissa argue, Becky says Larissa said she "would bring it up in elimination" but Larissa forces Becky to admit that she actually said, "if Shay says I did it I will defend myself"
The damage was done and it was clear that Shay and Larissa no longer trusted each other.

Having caused all the drama, Becky is upstairs pulling a Tango (packing her bags for sympathy) and crying her nose out. She's talking like this ..." I'm sick (sniff sniff) I'm sick (sniff sniff) I;m sick of myself (sniff sniff) This situation that we're in has made me (sniff) do some (sniff) fucking things (sniff)"
"Made me (sniff sniff) hurt my fucking friends" ( Oh please, your shenanigans, tears and plotting is all about saving your skin. Spare us the overshare)

Finally the guests arrive; Mo'Nique, Keith and Mikki. Mo'Nique is pleasantly surprised that "my babies care" but it doesn't take long to notice that one of her babies is missing...BECKY!

My experience is when you say you're leaving, a black woman helps you to pack. But Mo'Nique is very comforting and consoling as Becky spills her mind; spreading her melancholy on thick, for full-effect (I saw less tears on September 11th)

Downstairs, Keith (in a banging shirt as usual) tries to be the 'life-of-the party' but the girls ain't having it. Especially Shay who walks upstairs to eavesdrop on Mo'Nique and Becky.
Touched by Becky's sincerity she reveals herself and accepts her apology (smh)
But, she goes farther than that, saying she doesn't "want her (Becky) to go home for other reasons" (that reason would be selling your friend down the river)

She requests a private meeting with Mo'Nique (the same woman who said going to Mo'Nique is a bitch-move) and all but says Larissa is the thief whilst ignoring the HUGE PART she played in the theft of the picture.
She asks to speak to Larissa first and Mo'Nique agrees (as if that's gonna make one clit-lick of difference)

Elimination
Everyone is downstairs now but Larissa's eyes are on Shay, "I take a look at Shay and I see her puffy-ass eyes crying and I'm thinking this bitch has snitched."
At that point Mo'Nique announces "ladies, you have one hour 'til elimination"

Alone, Shay whispers to Larissa, but some of the shit she said should have been done in sign-language because Larissa was not tryna hear that. Shit like, "she knows, but it's better for you." (wtf? I must be dunce because that makes no damn sense)

Shay then cops an attitude, "I'm tryna save Larissa from going home and she got the nerve to call me a rat, when you're the one who turned the whole house against me? What does that make you? A backstabber"

At the Grand Hall, Becky, Shay and Larissa are called down to the carpet.
Keith addresses Becky and Shay but we don't need to hear that. We do need to hear what he said about Larissa, "you did great on that test, you shouldn't be down here, Brooke should be down here. But you don't have anyone to blame but yourself...and, you are clearly a certified psychopath" (Ouuuuch!)

"I don't think so", Larissa replied (you don't THINK so? Is that the best you can do?)
"I do", was Keith's retort (Damnnnn)

The decision is Mo'Nique's therefore, and after a useless argument with Larissa where she pleaded her case admirably, Mo'Nique had no choice but to expel her. Leaving Larissa to mouth outside, "She can kiss my black ass. I am Bootz, I am black and she can kiss my ass"
(she kicked your ass out, kissing it was never on her wishlist)

Shay has some choice words for Larissa on her exit but she's fooling herself because she is nothing but a self-serving snitch and next week it will be very interesting because the other four have paired off and if she thinks Becky will stand beside her because she effectively rescued her, she has another 'think' coming.

That's it...thanks for reading. Be sure to catch Gabrielle later this evening on the Elle Word with Mr. Boston expected to call in. (show starts 8pm EST, 5pm PST and the number to call is 646-478-5101)
Until then., Q-Gasm has an interview with Persia (The White Rapper Show) that's sure to interest you

(bear with me until I upload the pictures)